Understanding My Mom

As much as I love my mom, I never thought to take the time to understand her when I was young. I was a selfish child, and I just assumed other people should try to understand me, not vice versa.  If I was irate or sobbing about something, it was my mom's job to come over with kleenex, wipe the tears and snot from my face, and ask me what's wrong.

It wasn't until I moved away from home that I realized, "Wow, I don't know a whole lot about my mom."  I could tell you anything about Michael Jordan as a kid--where he went to 

college, how many times he'd been MVP, how many championships he'd won, and even when his birthday was (Feb. 17th)--but I couldn't tell you a whole lot about my own mother.  It was a sad realization.

So I sat down one day and did everything I could to get to know her better.  What I learned fascinated me.  She grew up loving horses, and rode them frequently.  She began smoking at an early age and regrets it to this day.  Her father favored her over one of her sisters, and it created a lot of animosity between her and her siblings.  My mom admits to loving the attention she received, but had some vicious fights with her sister Sheryl because of it.  

My mom claimed she was not a good student, and that I got my brains from my father.  But when I brought up the fact that he divorced her and left his children, so he couldn't be that smart, she laughed.  I was serious.  My mom never went to college though,  and got pregnant when she was 18.  She married soon after that, but sadly, her first husband died a few years later.  She stayed away from men for a while, but married my father because, as she claims, "He was soooo good looking."  Yuck.  Unfortunately, their relationship only lasted a couple years and he left my mom once I was born.  She said that she wishes she had made better choices with men, but doesn't regret having four beautiful children.

There is so much more to my mom that I could share, but I think the idea is clear: as I've learned more about my mom over time, and come to understand her better, I can't help but respect her 

more, and love her more, knowing all that she's been through.  She worked so hard to raise four children on her own, lost a husband to a fatal disease, and grew up dealing with constant feuds between her and her sister.  And now, after everything she's been through, she has to struggle 

each and every day with the illness she has.  

I'm just thankful I took the time to try to understand my mom a little better, before it's too late.